#starts cackling

[prince-of-red-lions]

giggles mischievously.

[unpretty]

the light outside our office kept flickering but we kept forgetting to put in a work order to have it fixed because we forgot about it until we were leaving and turning on the light for the night

so i finally just sent myself an email in the car to remind me when i got back to work, in all caps because i was mad this had been going on for weeks

which is why the first thing i saw when i got back after the long holiday weekend was this horror movie bullshit:

[spoopdeedoop]

world’s worst polycule

[essektheylyss]

everyone finding out about releasing Predathos like

[andi-o-geyser]

local gang of dnd players intimidate and viciously bully game show host sam reich, threatening to push his ass down the stairs like he's a 90-year-old grandma in a retirement home. more at 8

[alyakthedorklord]

Tim, sleep deprived + making coffee with five hour energy instead of water in front of his protesting family: If no one comes back from the future to stop me, how bad of an idea can it really be?

Future!Damian, made friends with Infinite Realms Royalty and discovered they had the infi-map, a time travelling artifact that he recognizes from the funniest thing that ever happened to him in his childhood: Hello Timothy.

Tim, nearly jumping out of his skin: OH HOLY- Damian?

Future!Damian: 😁

Batfam: 😳

Young Damian: 🫵😦

Tim: …ok there’s NO WAY that drinking this will-

Future!Damian: You’ll never find out, because you’re not going to try. Now hand over those cookies, I promised an inter-dimensional death deity I’d get him some if he let me do this. Also- (tosses random cryptic Clockwork message that will make sense eventually and Save the Day™ onto the table)

Future!Damian, very ominously: Take care of yourself, Timothy *vanishes with a flourish of the map and cackling echoey laughter, leaving the family cookie-less and in shock.*

Alfred: …Did he have to take the plate?

[nebula-remnants]

I Think Sun going into a giggling fit would sound like this your honor

[eggcats]

Alastor: I'd sooner put you on a leash and walk you like an animal than hold your hand.

Vox: I'm into that.

Alastor: The idea of your arousal disgusts me and I'll tell you as such any time I notice.

Vox: I'm also into that.

Alastor: I dislike the idea of having to see or deal with your soiling of yourself, and so I'll only permit you to find...release...under very specific circumstances.

Vox: You're not gonna believe this.

[braxix]

Press: How do you feel about being adopted.

Elrond: Uh...

Turgon:

Earendil:

Maedhros: He's not adopted.

Earendil: Yeah! Obviously Maedhros gave birth to him.

[cursedzucchini]

I'm currently taking care of family friends' cat bc they're on vacation, so obviously I'm gonna use that lol.

So. Vlad's on vacation. He has to leave his cat behind. He somehow forces Danny to take care of it while he's gone. You get the picture.

But the problem is, batfam started looking into this shady millionaire. And they finally decided to take action and look through this creep's mansion. But they forgot he obviously hired someone for babysitting his cat.

So now Danny walked in, he has headphones in, he's singing songs, doing his little dance. He gives the cat food, pets her, let's her out. Maybe he even gives water to the plants. And than he plops down, connects to the wifi and goes on social media.

Meanwhile batfam are trying to quickly figure out how to quickly complete their mission, without allerting this random teen. That's not that hard on itself, but he always seems to follow them! Especially Jason, Cass and Damian.

[another addition is that when Danny finally discovers them, they scare him so badly, he falls on the floor, accidentally duplicate and turns into his ghost form. He's floating over his body, looks down and then back at the bats "...I was about to say you scared me to death, but I don't think it's appropriate anymore" (yes I did thought of this specific scenario jist to put that joke there leave me alone). Batman meanwhile is trying very hard not to adopt the ghost (and cry. He's trying very hard not to cry.)]

[dizzybizz]

ok, look... i blame @dirtd0g for bringing up their asses with the dumpy tournament last week.....

literally all i could think was this:

[lilislegacy]

headcanon that percy and annabeth’s first baby’s favorite toy is a rubix cube. and when he’s an itty bitty baby, he just likes to hold it and wave it around and look at the colors. but then as he gets a little older, and you know, develops fine motor skills, he starts twisting it. he probably solves it for the first time when he’s like 1, which makes percy jump up and down over how genius his baby boy (OR GIRL @screenshotsonpinterest) is

and i don’t know why or when or how, but i know for a fact that at some point, that baby chucks that thing right at zeus. and it hits him square in the forehead. perfect shot.

i don’t make the rules

[sashketter]

Too bad Tech wasn’t around when Rampart was screaming Like That while jumping from the shuttle. He would’ve recorded it and put it on a loop, showed it to Omega on the ride back to Pabu, just constantly played it as a treat to all the clones the rat bastard wronged 😌💅🏽

[unknownarmageddon]

first kross of 2025 everybody cheer

cross belongs to jael peñaloza killer belongs to rahafwabas

[vyoongi]

[royalarchivist]

[ via @DuneDoArt ]

I'm not typically one to repost tweets, but literally every single time someone uses this emote for a bit I start cackling like a crazy person (the caption made me laugh too).